Bad News and a Brave Request!

I don't remember the last time that I felt brave...like GRRR!, brave...do you know what I mean? Over the last few days I've thought often of the Gary Haugen statement that, "Christ did not die to make us safe, but to make us brave." I want so much to make that part of my life.

Today, I received some disappointing news. You all know how we've waited for my FBI background check to come back so that we can bring Devin home for visits and get to spend some real, quality time with him. Well, I got a call from the social worker today informing me that the FBI had finally found my fingerprints, but they were having difficulty reading them. (I have an injury to my right hand that prevents me from fully extending my ring finger to get a proper fingerprint.) Anyway, the prints have to be sent to a completely different department and we will now be looking at another 30 days before my background check will be completed. It was like a knife though my heart! I was sure today was going to be the day it was over, and now I'm learning that I have at least 4 more weeks!

Of course, I cried for awhile, as the frustration mounted within me. God, if this is supposed to happen, why all the obstacles? This kid is 14 and not getting any younger after all. I've racked my brain trying to figure out who I know that has contacts in the FBI, (that number =0). As I was pouring my heart out to God, I kept telling Him that He was the highest ranking guy I knew to go to and asked Him for direction as to what to do.

In a moment of either God-directed brilliance or just a sad mother's desperation, I had the idea to email President Bush. I figure he has the number to the FBI and a little pull. I found the website and promptly poured out my heart to him as well.

Now I have no idea if this will ever reach him or have any affect on anything, the point is that I'm never that brave. I'm very aware of what a fruitless effort that email probably was, but rather than worrying about what people would do when they found out I did it, I just did it and sat back and felt brave for the first time in a very long time. Hey, you have to start small...but it feels GOOD!

As a funny p.s. to this, in my daily Bible reading, the reading for today is when Nehemiah asked King Artaxerxes to let him go and repair the walls of Jerusalem. This verse stuck out to me as wildly appropriate for my day:

O Lord, please hear my prayer! Listen to the prayers of those of us who delight in honoring you. Please grant me success now as I go to ask the king for a great favor. Put it into his heart to be kind to me. Nehemiah 1:11

This is my prayer today. As always, I'll keep you posted. I cherish all of you who are praying for us.