Red Light...Green Light

Do you remember that game from childhood? You ran toward a goal when someone yelled "green light", but as soon as "red light" was called, you had to freeze in your tracks until given permission to move again.

That's what my life and this adoption feels like right now. Unfortunately, we're on "red light" right now. It all seemed to be going along so well; we had a great church visit last week and then Wednesday night we went over to the group home for a game night. We played Apples to Apples and laughed and had a great time. He actually started kidding around with us and I could tell he felt a lot more comfortable with us. Something deep in my spirit said, "this is going to work." I left the group home so excited and ready get this done.

Now, we wait. Without our home study done, we're still at the mercy of other people to visit or contact him. Our case manager and his mentor have been great but I understand that they have lives and we're not their only priority. With his history of abandonment, I don't want him to wonder for a moment about our committment to him.

Please pray for me as I wait. I want to allow God to teach me whatever He needs to during this down time. Also pray for peace in Demetree's heart as I know that there is fear he will be disappointed again. We are waiting on my background check to come in and then final approval. I can't wait for the day we can welcome this boy home for the first and last time.

A Must-Read!

While we're waiting for all of our blah blah paperwork to be finished so that we can get this adoption process rolling, Stacey our social worker suggested that I read a book called, "three little words" by Ashley Rhodes-Courter. "Great, another book to read" was my first thought. But since I'll do anything they ask in that could make this process smoother both for Demetree and ourselves, I purchased said book and began to read it.

Anyone who knows me knows that I hate to read but I have spent every possible moment of the last few days enveloped in this story. This book was written by a girl who spent almost 10 years in the foster care system near Tampa. It is written from the perspective of a foster kid and you get to see that life from their perspective.

As you read this book, one can't help but feel so much compassion for these kids and want to rescue them. Look, I'm getting mushy again, but there are things that go on around you every day that you'll never see if you don't look.

Wow! As Jay and I go to visit Demetree tonight at GOV, I'll never look at any of those kids the same way again. I would highly recommend this book to anyone looking to either foster or adopt.

That's it. My first book review! (probably my last at the rate I read).
Thank you all for your prayers and support. They are truly cherished.

Ok, Just One More Tear-Jerker!

Anyone who knows me knows that I am not an overly-emotional person, but this young man is going to push me over the edge. I had to know how Demetree was doing after his trip to church, being the center of attention and seeming so overwhelmed.

I had made a small care package for him to take home, nothing big, just some blueberry muffins (his favorite), peanut butter balls and a People magazine (Miley Cyrus Special Edition - he loves her!)

This is an exerpt of the email I got from Angela, his wonderful mentor:

On the way to lunch he pulled out the magazine you gave him. He was quite excited about that as well as his favorite goodies you made. He told me, “I am going to put this magazine in plastic and show it to my kids in 30 years.” I told him he might not want to admit the old Hanna Montana crush to anyone 30 years from now. To that he said, “This is my first gift.”

Isn't that sweet? Can you imagine? If I had known, I would have bought something a little nicer!

Sometimes we take for granted the people around us, people who regularly express love to us in so many ways. The fact that Demetree cherishes a magazine because he's not used to people thinking of him and picking up small things causes me to sit back and appreciate the wonderful people that surround my life.

I thank God for Angela and the church that has kind of adopted him and been such a preserving presence in his life!

One Step Closer

First of all, welcome to the new blog. I was told to change it because of privacy issues. Apparently I messed up when I set this up because I put too much personal information on it that could not be removed. So from now on, you'll find me here.
This morning we got to go to breakfast with Demetree and his mentor, Angela and then they went to church with us. I warned them that my church family would be VERY excited to see them (especially Brandi). Poor Demetree. The guy was totally overwhelmed by the reception he received. I think it was a good thing for him to see that people cared about him and that we had been talking about him.
Pastor Jon gave an amazing talk about the depth of the love of God for us and how God loves for us to bring our needs to him and expect that our loving Father will hear and answer our prayers. I hope that Demetree heard how much God loves him!
After church, we had dinner with 33 of our closest friends at our house. (we need a bigger house!) It was so hectic, but I just love having a houseful of people. I don't want an empty nest; a big noisy one is a lot more fun!
Please pray that our home study is completed soon. We're so anxious to make this young man a part of our family!

I'm Overwhelmed

God is so good and I'm constantly amazed at how He works. These last couple of days have been consumed with getting our final paperwork done and all of our references submitted so that Stacy would have everything for our home study. We're so anxious for it to be completed because then we have much greater freedom to visit with Demetree and really get to know him. Right now everything has to be supervised and it's so hard to get everyone scheduled at the same time.

Anyway, I have received the sweetest emails from people concerning Demetree that have really encouraged my heart, one from someone I don't even know. I thought I'd share just a few of the thoughts I've received:

My wife and I have been praying hard for Demetree and at one point I felt that maybe we should adopt him. He has been staying in our young adults class with Angela just because he felt more comfortable. We have enjoyed having him. He is a very smart young man. He was involved in the lessons and gave answers when others would not. Angela has shared some information with us about your meeting, the affection you have already shown for him, and she is so excited for him, as are we. I know also that he has a great feeling about you all also. He is well behaved and shows good character for a 14 or 15 year old boy. Well I wanted to let you know that we are praying for this union and that God's will is done and that he gets the glory. I hope that we will get to see him from time to time when this is all set. May God bless you for opening your heart up to a young person that need a family.

From his mentor, Angela:

The past few years have been a blessing to me and to all those that have grown to know and love this child. I have felt for a long time that everyone; myself, my husband, best friend and her family, our Sunday School class and church have all been called together by the Lord to guide this child until he finds his way home. I truly believe that time is finally upon us and my heart sings with joy!!

You don't know how much these kind words mean to me. I get so many people that basically tell us that we're nuts for doing this. It doesn't matter. At this point there's nothing that's gonna put out my fire!

So now we wait for the completion of our home study. Please pray that it's wrapped up quickly. Meanwhile, Angela and Demetree are coming to church with us this weekend. I want him to see just how large (and nosey) his new family will be! I'll be the one with the grin from ear to ear! I'm going to try to sneak a few pictures; I'm sure I'll look like a gomer!

Thank you all for continuing to walk this journey with us!

Happy Happy Joy Joy!

We just returned from having lunch with Demetree and his mentor Angela. I was so nervous at our first meeting as possible adoptive parents. What would we talk about? What would we say? How can I possibly be natural and not just trying to impress them? These are the questions that have plagued me since I found out about our meeting.

Well, God is gracious and it went better than I could have expected. At Angela's prompting, Demetree brought with him a list of icebreaker questions that everyone had to ask. We all went around the table answering our questions, laughing and sharing stories. When I looked up we had been at the restaurant for 2 1/2 hours! And I was afraid we would run out of things to say!

I guess it's in God's hands now (I guess it's always been, I just forget sometimes). We'll see what the next step is. I will probably hear more tomorrow when the social worker, Stacey, gets the report.

Please continue to pray for us that we would be OK with whatever God has in store.
It's so scary yet so exciting at the same time!

Look Mom, I'm Blogging

Trust in the Lord and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Delight yourself in the Lord
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37: 3-4

The Hebrew word for "trust" in the above verses means literally to put all of your weight on something, to lean completely on something or someone. This is a lesson that the Lord is trying to teach me right now.

For those of you who don't know me, my name is Whitney. I am a 44 year-old mother of 2 teenage girls. My husband Jay and I have been married for 21 years.

The passion of my heart has always been to adopt a kid who needed a chance at a stable life and family. For years my husband did not share my passion and it was very rough for me. But, God is good and over the years my husband's heart has softened to the point that he himself signed us up for the MAT classes necessary for fostering and adoption.

Anyone who has been involved in this process knows the red tape and endless waiting involved. During this time, my husband really has focused on a particular kid, Demetree, who is 14 and has had 2 previously failed adoptions. This is him in the photo above. I was so excited that God had laid this kid on Jay's heart.

Long story short, we are nearing the end of our paperwork and have found out that another family is interested in OUR boy! I was immediately thrown into a panic. Luckily, I am surrounded by friends who will immediately challenge me and call me to the truth. If you don't have those kinds of people around you, I HIGHLY encourage you to find people you can be vulnerable with.

Today I found out that my family and I will be having lunch with Demetree and his mentor on Sunday afternoon. Please pray that I put all the weight of my trust and my emotions squarely on Jesus and that I don't try to manipulate the situation in to what I think would be best.

I'll let you all know how this all comes out but I do covet everyone's prayers as
I lean...I lean...I lean on Jesus.